7 Signs You Should Go To Couples Counseling

If you’ve ever thought, “should we go to couples counseling?” then this blog is for you.  

Relationships can be amazing and loving - but they can also be MESSY.  

And it’s hard to know how messy is too messy.  And there is such a thing as too messy.  But if you call in a relationship expert to help you clean it up, you can avoid total relationship disaster. 

Here are some signs couples therapy could be a game-changer for you and your partner:

1. Your conversations turn into full on fights - or full on silence

If having a normal relationship conversation with your partner turns into a full-blown argument (or complete shutdown), you might need a pro to help you change that.  That’s not healthy, y’all. Couples counseling can teach you how to bring up difficult topics without an all out screaming match, or days and days and days of silence. Imagine a hard relationship convo feeling connecting instead of disastrous.  That could be you!

2. You feel more like roommates than partners

You get along, you split chores, and maybe you even laugh sometimes. But even if you’re getting along -  when your partner feels more like a roommate than a partner, it might be time to check in. 

Couples therapy can help bring the spark back. Emotionally and physically. It’s about reconnecting, not just coexisting.  With a little work, you could turn your roommate-ship into a roommates-with-(emotional & physical)-benefits-ship. 

3. You fight about the same thing… over and over and over again

EVERY COUPLES HAS A FIGHT LIKE THIS. 

The one that never really ends. You make up, move on, and then bam! It’s back. That’s not a sign that your relationship is broken. It’s a sign that your same old fight needs a fresh perspective. 

A couples counselor can help you figure out what’s underneath the repeat argument and shift how you both respond.  We can’t promise that it won’t be an issue in the future (spoiler alert - all couples have perpetual problems!), but you can turn the volume down on the issue so that it doesn’t come up as frequently or as intensely. 

4. Trust is GONE

Maybe it was cheating, or hiding debt, or telling a bunch of lies to stay out of trouble — but the vibe you have is “I don’t trust you..”  That lack of trust does not go away on its own.  

Couples therapy creates space to work through hurt and rebuild safety—without blame, but with accountability.  Despite what most people believe, you can rebuild trust.  Or, you could keep hoping it comes back on its own.  Your choice. 

5. Life changes have your relationship out of wack

Even exciting changes like getting married, moving, switching jobs can cause a shake-up in a relationship.  Change naturally causes stress.  If you’re navigating a big shift and feeling off-balance, therapy can help you feel like a team again. It’s not about preventing stress. It’s about managing it together.

6. Big topics feel off limits

You want to talk about money, sex, family planning, or future goals but it gets tense fast. You might avoid it, or it always ends in a fight. Couples counseling helps make those hard conversations feel safe, supportive, and productive. No more walking on eggshells.  More talking about money, sex, and future.

7. Your relationship is “fine,” but you want more. 

THIS IS THING #1 THING COUPLES COUNSELORS WISH YOU KNEW: You don’t need to be struggling to benefit from couples therapy.  You might want a deeper connection, or a more meaningful sex life. Therapy can help deepen your emotional connection, create better daily rituals, and make sure your relationship gets the care it deserves.

If you want to learn more about how WE do couples counseling, check out our Couples Counseling page here. 

Connection Couples Counseling provides marriage, family, and co-parenting counseling to couples in Wyomissing, PA. We see couples virtually across the state of Pennsylvania.